'BURRITO UPDATES'

     Attempting to write a blog entry while holding a baby is both strange and happening right now. I am telling you this as a sort of social experiment like Jane Goodall or Dr.Seuss. As we all know, Jane was trying to figure out the lifestyles of apes and Dr.Seuss was trying to figure out if he could exaggerate a cat's fashion sense and attention to headgear. My goal is a bit different today.
     See, when I look at others peoples blogs, tweets or Facebook Statuses, they seem to share with their readers the most trivial details like "About to eat a burrito" or "This quilt seems to be coming along nicely...will keep you posted" while mine are not like this so far. This is not because I am too awesome for this. No sir. If a million people said they would read me were I to write of such things, I would fill the Net with more Burrito updates than you thought possible. In my defense, I think I would do it better, though. Surely, I would describe the burrito as a "Tortilla Bus filled to near capacity with protesters on their way to my Tummy Rally" or something like that. I would see no reason to tell you it was delicious because I trust my readers to know that just like a Gorilla who is angrily pounding at his chest in an effort to get Jane to stop writing in her Journal, "delicious" is the natural state for a burrito to be in.

     So far, (and I may alter this in time), my blog has leaned toward what I am told is "very weird"or "eccentric." Really, imaginary critic? Is that your complaint? Well buckle in, you summammabitch. Cuz we're on the Tortilla Bus. Next stop: "Weirdville."
     Here was my experiment: The idea was I would tell you, my 50 million readers, that I am writing this with a baby on my lap to show you that "Hey, I could update you with shit you shouldn't care about, too", so after reading about some guys growing collection of stamps, come on over here to BansheeMilk and I'll tell you what I had for breakfast. It was a burrito.And on the side? Another burrito.
     Let's hope this brings my readership up another 1 million readers, making it 51 million if my math is dope. Teacher used to always bitch, "Your math is not dope enough." Well, who just wrote an awesome blog entry while the other guy was still a victim of murder, huh? Think about it, Dead Teacher, think about it.

written by Tony Santiago, and yes, all rights reserved, BUT feel free to share this on your Twitter feed, facebook page or whatever. Also go visit my YouTube channel. Stop being stupid. You know I just made you laugh and your pants are down. Finish.