'Yesterday's Crossdressing Fiasco.'

      Standing in line at the grocery store, I mourned the line I had chosen. The one to my right was moving at a fevered pace, food items being thrown into bags like hand grenades. Meanwhile, my line was glacially pulling forward towards the Ship it wanted to destroy (me), whose steel hide would prove no match for the oncoming iceberg known as slow customer service. I found myself wondering why ships are often referred to as 'She' when they are not 'She' but rather, a damn boat, when I heard, "Young man, why are you wearing ladies shoes?"

         I looked down instinctively and thought 'Am I' even though, I knew I had put on an old pair of Chucks.
See, at times I do wear what is thought of as 'womens clothing' although I have never seen any genitalia on the garments and so I have always considered clothing to be genderless, like a ham, a chair, or as I said before, a boat(admittedly, a ham used to have genitals but no more as they are mighty tasty around Christmas). Then, I saw that the person who asked the question was an old lady in front of me in line and that she had said it to a young guy of 18 or 19. He was dressed as your average layabout grunge kid would in the early 90s only he had on an enormous pair of high heels. I was thinking they looked expensive but the old lady in front of me was just confused as to why he would put these shoes on.
       The boy, who was accompanied by a male friend, shouted back, "Because I can!"
       He was lucky, I thought, that her eyes were not guns, because if they had been, the reaction they gave to his answer would certainly have pulled the trigger on each. The boy's answer was given loudly and for a second I even thought he was being rude. Well, maybe a millisecond. Because then, I thought about it. Analyzed it.
      We all wanna say, "Oh, let her off the hook! She's old!" How old exactly? I don't know. But,  looking at her I would wager around 80. Which means she can recall a time when pants, for example, were just for men. Now guess what she was wearing. PANTS!!!
       I said 'Good for you' to the boys, who in turn, said 'Thanks.'
       Then, I heard the cashier say to the old lady, "There's no reason to be so fucking rude!"
       "I didn't think I was being rude," the old lady said.
       "No, not you," the cashier continued,"those gay boys. I mean, I know God loves them, too, but they're the ones dressed like that.'
       I had to speak up.
      "Ladies, you both are wearing pants."
      "So? What's wrong with that?"
      "Not a thing. But, pants were originally intended for men. So, in turn, there is nothing wrong with a man wearing shoes intended for women. It is only consistent."
       Both women rolled their eyes at me.
       "Okay, you can roll your eyes if you want but, it doesn't qualify as a genuine comeback. It is just something people do when they lack the foundation for an intelligent argument."
       They ignored me and I let it go.
       The boys were leaving and shouted "Bye Haters" in an intentionally gay tone. They sounded like southern belles saying 'Yoo Hoo' to a barebacked horseshoer.
       But just then, the cashier yelled, "Wear a dress next time!"
       This made me angry for 2 reasons.
       #1. It was said in a tone of hatred. She sounded something not unlike Lex Luthor promising Superman "will pay for his do-gooder theatrics" which proved her to indeed be a hater.
       #2. It didn't make sense as an insult since the boy would most likely have no problem with wearing a dress and would not be offended at the concept. Imagine that you are angry at an Ice Cream Man who liked his job. Screaming 'Go sell a waffle cone' would not be the best way to hurt his feelings, now, would it?
No, of course not.
       Just the same, I informed a manager that the cashier was yelling at customers. A strange business model if there ever was one. I don't think we should let such hateful thinking go unchecked in modern society.
       Then, I finally checked out and walked to my car. I thought about how fast some right wingers will turn to quick bursts of  anger and hate before a shred of thought pops into their head.
      The line on the left moves slower but with a precision and clarity that is much healthier.
                                         

written by Tony Santiago, all rights reserved.